Foot Pneumonia

I’m currently on vacation in San Francisco California with my husband and the in laws and somehow the trip out here wasn’t worthy of a post. It was honestly the most trouble/annoyance free trip I’ve ever made.  And there hasn’t been too much here that’s been on my nerves either… which I suppose is the point of vacation. Though we all know they don’t always turn out that way.

I did however see something over and over again on the streets of the city today that did tweak at a pet peeve of mine.  Today was windy, cloudy and a high of about 58 in the city. I myself was wearing skinny jeans, flats, a camisol with a cardigan over it, and a matching beanie because well… I have no hair to keep me warm.  And while it wasn’t “cold” I kept seeing women wearing everything from long wool peacoats to scary Lion Witch and the Wardrobe fur coats, paired with flip flops, or sandals. Now… if it’s cold enough you need a jacket… aren’t your poor naked feet freezing? This reminded me of two things.  First, the time my mother yelled at me for being barefoot in the cold because I was going to catch “Foot Pneumonia”… my Mom is nuts, in an unbeleivably adorable way.  And second, another similar pet peeve of mine… sleeveless sweaters. If it’s cold enough for you to need a thick sweater on your torso… aren’t your uncovered arms cold?

All I’m saying is, shouldn’t all the items of your outfit be in the same season?  Or at least not functionally retarded and nonsensical? I’m trying to save the world from a Foot Pneumonia Pandemic.

What a Croc

The topic of Crocs shoes was recently suggested to me as a blog topic and well… I couldn’t agree more. I must admit they are a phenomenon I have never truly understood. I wear a pair of flats all day without stockings or socks and my feet sweat more than is socially acceptable for any woman, so the thought of sticking my feet in rubber shoes does not appeal to me in any way. Sure, they have little ventilation holes in them but unless they also come with a clip on foot fan I don’t see those doing a whole lot of good. It seems like you might at well buy a tube if tough actin’ Tenactin when you buy your Crocs because athletes foot is nearly inevitable.

It would seem the only true justification of rubber footwear involves protection from water, a pair of rain boots for puddle jumping, some hip waders for fishing… you get the idea. But these can’t even suit that purpose given the previously mentioned holes. Ok, so then maybe it’s because they’re presumably non-slip being as they are made of rubber. I can understand therefore the appeal for restaurant employees to a certain extent, but honestly the only person who has truly ever owned that look is Mario Batali with his signature orange Crocs. And I have a feeling that’s due more to the fact that the Iron Chef looks like a Viking who could rip your head off, than anything else. I mean who’s going to tell him he looks ridiculous?

Lastly, it annoys me that this idea is seen by some as so unusual or special… rubber shoes people?  Yeah… we’ve done that before. It was the late 80’s and they were called Jellies, and THOSE were awesome. I mean at least my cute little clear purple rubber sandals had glitter in them… beat that style!

This Little Piggy

I love shoes. I own many pairs of them, all shapes and colors and sizes. And all of them aside from a few heel grips on some pumps (I have narrow heels) fit me extremely well. Why? Because when I buy shoes I try them on. Because they all fit differently just like clothing. I have some flats that are 5 1/2 (this is the part where girls with big Sasquatch feet start to hate me) some of my heels are 6’s some of my sneakers and boots are even 7’s… it all depends. Are you wearing them with or without sock? Are they pointy or rounded… etc. etc. So tell me people… why is it so hard for some women to buy the proper size of shoe?

Example to the left: this girl seems put together, nice shoes, nice legs, nice manicure… except her big long monkey toes are curly over the edge of her shoe and look like they’re trying to take a drag off that cigarette butt on the ground next to her foot. I know sometime your feet slide down in your shoes when you’re wearing heels… gravity is real. But considering the back of her heel is against her shoe I’m guessing there was no room for sliding, her talons were spilling out of those shoes the minute she put them on. Why would this happen? Did she just HAVE TO HAVE the shoes and they didn’t have them in her real size so she just bought the closest they had? In which case, what a waste of money, even if something is on sale for super cheap, if it doesn’t fit you at the end of the day it’s a waste of money. I think my friend at Smart Style Tips would back me up on that.  My other theory is that women with large feet are ashamed of their Ronald McDonald feet and therefore attempt to squeeze into smaller sizes to feel better.  But shoes are just like jeans, you buy a smaller size and you look worse. You’re busting at the seems and your muffin tops are over flowing.

Example to the right: this girl also seems put together with the cute pencil skirt etc. But the first thing that pops into my head is… did she borrow those shoes from her mommy? She looks like a little kid playing dress up with and inch of extra space in her heel. And that is a gap that once again gravity may have broadened but didn’t create and there is no amount of heel grips that can fill that in.  These cases I especially don’t understand because how on Earth can she even walk without stepping right out of her shoes? And why would she even want to try? Is it another case of have to have and nothing in your size? Did you borrow them from a friend? If so… borrow from a friend with smaller feet next time.  As a person with small feet myself I sometimes have a hard time finding shoes in certain styles but at the end of the day, they’re out there and even if you have to pay a little more to get them at least you won’t look like an idiot #1 and #2 you’ve spent your money on something that won’t be torturing your feet one way or the other.  I’m not saying all shoes are ever going to be comfortable, we as women continually sacrifice comfort for fashion. But a pinched pointy toe is different than cramming your size 11 into a 7.